A note about dealing with anger from Karen Chraska:
a cheery thing to ponder this Christmas Season. In fact, when the worship team
first landed on the Inside Out Christmas theme, I’ll admit I was less than
confident the choice was a good one. Now after digging deeper and living into
the themes, I am so thankful we are going there!
oldest child of an alcoholic, I live into the stereotype quite well. I am super
responsible. I never want to let anyone down. I want everyone around me to be
happy and satisfied. I thrive on approval and affirmation.
I tried to
diffuse my Dad’s anger, which intensified when he was drinking. My parents had
a rocky marriage and as a child I remember them asking me numerous times who I
would live with if they separated. That was a painful question because I loved
them both and didn’t want to disappoint either one.
did separate the summer before my senior year of high school. My Mom got the
courage to leave after my Dad got angry (over something I can’t remember) and
threw a bottle of hot sauce at my brother. They divorced several years later.
My Dad, who
passed away from metastatic melanoma in 2008, wasn’t a bad
man. He had a lot of wonderful qualities. When he was drinking and got angry,
he lived out the violent behavior he witnessed his Dad exhibit.
I rarely get
really angry. I would say I get frustrated with things or people much more than
angry. I want to snuff out anger quickly and efficiently and move on to joy! I
really can relate to Joy in the movie Inside Out. I prefer to move through the
unpleasant quickly to get to the good stuff. This isn’t always the healthiest
way to deal with conflict and anger. My family pushes me to speak up so that I won’t be run over just to
people of various personality types, including my own family, I have dealt with
anger of all forms and varieties.
1:19… "Let every person be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to
That is the
goal, but it is really hard! My
husband, Dan, watches what I call the "argumentative political"shows at night.
He likes to stay caught up on current events. I can’t stand them.
It seems to
me no one listens, everyone tries to speak (at once), and everyone is angry at
those who have different views. I think this is representative of our culture:
make those who disagree with us out to be villains.
I am not a
television watcher, but I listen to the radio every day. Several times recently
I have heard a "Prayerful Pause." I heard a message that I think is really well
put, "In the face of gentle honesty, anger often diffuses."
been so true in my life and ministry. I know in the life of the church I have
stepped on toes, communicated poorly, been insensitive, pushed my own agenda
and made more faux pas than I can count!
and gratefully I can say when I relate to people with gentle honesty, the
person or persons I have offended respond with kindness and forgiveness, every
time without exception.
Proverbs 15:1, "A gentle response turns away anger, but a harsh word stirs up
peace and love this season and healthy ways to diffuse and deal with anger.